Back to Bharat

November 15, 2017

Question on childrens day

Filed under: daughter, family, personal — neosurya @ 09:58

I spent time at my kids school during children’s day. My wife and I picked up my daughter and headed over to my younger ones school. There was community lunch at the younger ones school. All kids were supposed to get items from their homes and have a shared lunch with parents and kids in the class.

When we got to the school, we went over to the classroom and laid out the biriyani we had made. We started helping the teacher set-up the tables, arrange the items kids had brought. About 6-7 children sat together in groups. I took charge of one group, and started putting their items together.

After some fun time, a kid asked me – “You know, my father is a big man in a big office. He could not come here. Do you not have a job? Is that why you could come?” I smiled at the kid and walked to a different part of the room. The question jarred me. It was not like I did not have a job, or disliked what I did at work. I had the luxury, and the expertise of managing my work life balance very well. I can say that among wage earners, I am probably in the top 5-10 percentile in the country. I had tremendous job satisfaction, and great freedom at work. But this statement still rubbed me very wrongly. I wanted to leave, and even urged my wife that I wanted to sit in the car. It took at least a few minutes for me to control my ego.

There were about 40 kids, one teacher, and 6 other adults in the class. I and my wife were the only couple among those adults. The lack of participation by parents did not miss out on the children. Many students had accepted it to be natural. This child went ahead and became inquisitive. I wondered if I was giving my children wrong expectations about life.

I tend to look at life in a holistic manner. I do not compartmentalize life as a job, a car, a house, or a title.

When I was younger, I was taught:
Life is not just a bicycle.
Life is not just a TV serial.
Life is not just a restaurant outing.
Life is not just your anger.

This was done purportedly to make me focus on studies and ensure a better future. This teaching has helped me, and now I realize.

Life is not my ego.
Life is not my job.
Life is not my house.
Life is not my car.

Someday, I will internalize:
Life is not this body.

Life is a sequence of sunrises and sunsets, tied together with strings of beautiful and painful experiences.


May 18, 2017

The mango cutter and his daughter

Filed under: daughter, social change, Uncategorized — neosurya @ 21:38


Early morning of a May day, a father and daughter in the market starting their day. The father is expecting his business to pick up. His equipment – a gunny bag, a cloth, and a large cutter that is used to cut ripe mangoes that will be turned into pickles.

I was reminded of a day when I took my daughter to work. And this is another father who is taking his daughter to work. Such a contrast. What did I do to deserve this differential treatment?

November 5, 2008

We grew from 2 to 3….

Filed under: daughter, personal — neosurya @ 18:53

On November 5th 2008, we were blessed by a beautiful girl. I hope that she will be a fine citizen of India.

Blog at